we have moved!

thank you for reading this blog all these while. since the first trimester is up, i thought to move the posts back to http://thenest.garynchristine.com so that i could keep up with the posts better. :)

first trimester

i'm finally at that finish line of the first trimester. according to chinese customs, it's now safe to tell others the good news. and i thought i would feel happy telling others the news of a little one on the way too. but, when the time has come, i just didn't want other people to know besides relatives. first, i'm still worried about the pregnancy. secondly, i can't bear the thousands of advices from other people especially those who are mothers. so, i'm still keeping the secret safe with me and hence, have not migrated my pregnancy posts to my other blog.

pressies from all over the world!

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hands and legs

i went for my follow-up today and was so excited that we got to see the baby's hands and legs. the OB is quite happy with what he is seeing on the ultrasound. he has also prescribed vitamins for me. besides that, all is well and it's nice to work from home. :)

bump at 2.5 months?

it's truly funny how others after viewing my bump thought that i'm already at 4 months. and i'm only 2.5 months. i've never really been at that "fat" stage. even at 6 weeks, my stomach has seemed pregnant. i don't know.... perhaps it's because i'm petite so it starts showing quicker. i'm still trying to hide it at times especially when attending social functions because i cannot stand the 10,000 of advices some mothers shower upon me. but, i think i'll have to give up soon on that because it's becoming more and more obvious. i'll be going for a follow-up tomorrow and i wonder how big has my little one grew.... i'm quite anxious.

a little better

thank goodness i'm feeling much better now. i was stuck with flu the whole of last weekend (sigh!) and was on medical leave on monday. yesterday, i was on half day because towards the afternoon, i felt worst and my nose was painful due the the blocked nose. when i went home yesterday, i rested a lot and i think that helped with the flu.

i'm back at work now and am trying to be very gungho about everything. i'm also beginning to surf online for baby items for budget purposes. baby items in malaysia is not cheap... a baby cot could cost up to RM 600 (equivalent to USD 170). of course all of these depends on the materials and brands.

my hubby just bought me maternity clothes (again!) that cost up to RM271 for 5 pieces. so now, i have about 10 pieces of maternity clothes. most of them pants and blouses. i can't stand the dresses. and the pants and blouses work well for officewear too. :)

nothing's right

nothing is going right today. my back is aching, my clothes to work looks lousy, my health is now contaminated with flu, my work cannot be completed in time not due to the fault of my own and because of that, i cannot go home and rest. and i keep worrying how all this is affecting the little one. and when i think that way, i become disappointed with myself and causing myself to feel depressed. i don’t know. i just feel lousy.

demotivated

i feel so demotivated at work these days... especially when i do not have nice maternity clothes to wear to work. i don't like trying to fit into my normal clothes that are now too snuggly for my size. they just don't fit nicely!

the other thing is that i feel bored easily and tired at work that i'm tired of trying to look energetic and okay because i'm not. after lunch, i'll feel so tired and not in a mood at all to be in the office but there's nothing i can do about it unless the arrangement for me to work from home is approved sooner... well, more like i'm waiting for a token to be mailed from US so that i could check my e-mails from the webmail. it'll probably arrive after i've delivered!

my nose bled this morning when i woke up from bed. so, i had to wait until it subsided before i can get dress and come to work. well, i guess this is one of the perks of being pregnant. i'm just trying to be positive. for me, as long as i have signs telling me that i'm pregnant and that the baby is alive in me, i seize them and rejoice. a person truly sees things differently when he/she has to overcome obstacles to get to where he/she is now.

good appetite

i went for my 3rd check-up today and the baby has grown from 2.9mm (2 weeks ago) to 18.8 mm today. doc said i must have good appetite which i admitted i did. and all symptoms have left me alone except for the occassional backache. but, it's fine as long as baby is healthy, strong and happy. now, the baby's due date is confirmed on 25th april 2008. :)

weight: 47.2 kg

feeling a little bit better

the backache comes and goes now. it's not permanent anymore. so, that is good. the nauseous is also leaving me so now i can go back eating normal food instead of porridge all the time. so far, i've gained 0.4kg now that i'm almost 2 months.

tired

i was so tired last night after a long day managing a conference that i slept for 12 hours straight. this morning when i woke up, i have a terrible back pain and nose bleed (again!). can’t wait for friday to be over that i can just sleep!

nose bleed

while riding the elevator up to my office, i felt like my nose was runny. when i touched my nose, my finger turned red and then, i realised that i had a bleeding nose. immediately, i went to the washroom and waited until the nose stopped bleeding. when i came into the office, i immediately googled nose bleeding with pregnancy and found out that it’s pretty normal as a result of more blood circulation in the body while pregnant. phew!

6w3d

in my previous pregnancy, the last scan i did which i managed to see my baby's heartbeat was at 6w1d. after that, i had a painful miscarriage.

and now that i'm at 6w3d, i'm beginning to be calmer and positive about this pregnancy. however, as much as i would like to eat for the baby's sake, my taste bud has gone haywire. everything tastes so bland to me that it becomes truly difficult for me to stomach anything. i like food like porridge and soupy food now. fruits are still fine. but, used-to-be favourite food of mine like spicy olio is now tasteless. sigh....

but besides that, i thank God each day for a blessed baby. :)

5W6Ds

i had a terrible itch surrounding the vaginal area for the last 3 days and finally decided to see the OB today. i gave him a call and he asked me to go over. so, i left work at 5 pm and and rushed to the hospital. i was at the hospital at 5:30 pm and after the nurse took my weight, blood pressure and urine, i waited until 7 pm before i got to see my OB. when he saw me, he used a speculum to check for fungus that might be causing the itch. but, he said everything looks fine. but, he did give me medication and cream to ease the itch. and the OB mentioned that since i was already there, he might as well do a scan for me to see the baby’s heart beat. and we saw the heart beat! tears nearly came rolling down my face. i was just so thankful to God for a miracle!

by the time i paid the bills (RM122) and collected my medication, i was tired. i still had to go to my parents’ house to take dinner and then go home. when i arrived home, it was already 8:30 pm. i was so exhausted but thank God that the baby is coming along fine. :)

little tiny bump

i’m at my 5th week now and have been worried about the baby all the time even though the OB told me not to. because if i do, my time will pass slower… which is true. sigh! but how is it possible not to worry?

even though i’m at my 5th week, the bump is quite obvious… it’s tiny but still obvious. i have a good appetite these days and i rest a lot… approximately 10 hours a day. my manager has been very kind and understanding. i’m allowed to come into work at 10 am. so, i get up at about 8:30 am and i reach work about 9:15 am. not too bad…. i take our dinner from my parents’ place as to ease my workload. i’m glad that i don’t have many symptoms except for backache and tender breasts. but, that’s fine as long as the baby is healthy and strong. also, i wonder whether has my taste bud changed. because i cooked spicy olio yesterday which is our favourite but it didn’t taste as nice to me anymore. hmm….

hungry all the time

ever since i suspected that i was pregnant, i've been hungry most of the times. usually, i'll take my breakfast of quaker oats (with milk and egg) at 7:45 am before leaving for work and then lunch at 12 noon which will last me till dinner at about 7:30 pm. however, now, i eat my breakfast at about 9:00 am (because i buy something to bring to work to eat but i've got to change back to my habit of eating quaker oats because it's healthier and then, i'll feel hungry at 10:30 am which i will munch down something. lunch is at the usual 12 noon and then, i'll be hungry again at 3:30 pm. and i feel like i can't wait for dinner at 7:30 pm because i'm just so hungry. thank goodness i sleep earlier these days because i feel tired faster if not, i think i'll be scouring the fridge for more food!

first check-up

after work today, i went to see my OB to confirm the pregnancy. he was very nice to me by firstly beginning to remind me once again that the previous miscarriage was of nobody’s fault especially mine. then, he began to calculate my due date based on the first day of my last menses. he told me that i am 6 weeks along but i knew that i am only 4 weeks along. so, after that, he did a vaginal scan and confirmed that the pregnancy sac is obvious and that i’m really only 4 weeks along. he congratulated us and gave me duphaston (hormone pills) to take until the next check-up in 2 weeks’ time. the bill cost RM156 (RM 14 for admin charges, RM 50 for consultation, RM 20 for ultrasound and RM 56 for medication). after that, we went for our dinner and i slept at 10pm.

weight: 46.1 kg

i'm pregnant!

after consulting with my gynae, mom and my manager, i've finally decided not to wait and to make use of my last pregnancy test. and it came out to be positive! God is truly gracious!

i can finally join the maternity, pregnant and etc membership that i was robbed off last time.

please pray that God will keep my little one safe.

still waiting patiently

today is the 35th day since my last menses. i’m still waiting to take the pregnancy test. i’m quite excited yet am afraid to hope. my stomach is quite bloated and i’m experiencing tender breast. but, that’s about it. maybe, a little backache. but, still am afraid to hope….

a dizzy spell

i woke up this morning with a terrible dizzy spell. i'm much better now.... well, still waiting to see how everything goes....

a secret journey

i started this blog to avoid family and friends who check out my personal blog because i don't want them to know about my secret journey.

this journey began when i had to deal with ectopic pregnancy in july 2006 and a miscarriage in april 2007.

these days, i'm feeling pregnant yet i've been so afraid to think about it because my period due date is not up yet and i'm just so afraid that it will appear....